Tag Archives: challenges

My relationship status

Current relationship status (The I Blog)

My relationship status, Ha. I have been procrastinating to the max to avoid writing this blog but I know I have to. I love deeply and always invest everything that is me, in a relationship. What a seriously stupid thing to do. I refuse never to not love myself a huge load again. We could call it risk mitigation, which is also a competency I have practiced to skill during many years of entrepreneurship. Only a few people have lots of chances, some have several but most people only have one or none at all. I just blew it big time throwing everything in the air well knowing the challenge of catching it all coming down. Me, always being the loner, did not perform at my best in this situation and I’m grateful to have a strong family backbone for support. Some philosophers say that if your fully mentally developed you will not change over time but trauma, such as PTSD, does exactly that no matter how complete you were. I was at the top of my game. As incensed to learn even more as I write this blog in grave pain. My chest hurts and I’m exhausted.. was left hanging eroding over a long time, alone and finally discarded. My relationship ended as one severe human rights violations of sorts. Maybe even eligible for a lawsuit, but I will not do that. After having gone through three costly litigations, all of which I won, I know that it does not matter who is wrong or who is right. Lawsuit would be trolling and unkind. You owe nobody nothing Mr. Toudal, only yourself . Just start living already, why don’t you.

I managed to reside in a long distance relationship, by being the best of friends, waiting for my girl for six odd years. In the end we suffered a bad breakup as I were the horrible option. It is not a first time experience for me as I have lost big before but nothing alike compares. My mind is going bonkers. What is wrong with me. Why am I not enough. Science say I will be heartbroken way into a return ticket from mars. Reflecting on everything, I have major regrets but my story is my burden and my burden alone as such I will not divulge details. It is a bad story on me that both make me look like a total and complete moron but it would also put my x-girlfriend on the spot. She killed me, many times and now all these shitty things eats my mind and my soul griefs to makes my sleep incoherent. I am not jealous guy but very destructive or so it seems. I replay memories. Truths, lies, manipulation and deceit. It flabbergasts me how I could remain at bliss so long. Calm may be a superpower but in hindsight it was really just super stupid to consent to someone who makes it obvious. Good guys never finish, they just slow burn. That is me in life, both professionally and privately. Michael Toudal is the wild black horse in pile of offers, the wild card, the joker, the bad-boy-genious everybody copy, the inventor corporates shadow meet oh the human exploits. All I ever wanted was to love big, feel loved back, belong somewhere and be with someone who gets me. Someone who gets all excited when I asks: ¡Let’s go play! ¿Who wanna build a snowman?

My x had a horrible track record of asshole boyfriends. My mind rests at peace realizing she is happy and that I changed her story. If asked she will have to confess that her x-boyfriend was one of the really good guys. I don’t need a mirror to spot I am a superhero. We mature with damage, not with the years. Life humbles us as we age especially when we realize just how much time we waste on inordinate nonsense. With no rich parents, no handouts, no favors just straight up hustle all day everyday the most important thing every man should know, is what he is willing to die for. I know what I would die for and I did. I took one for the team. Me and my x laughed, cared and lived but just like when you feel a malignant itch coming it helps to expose yourself to new adventures. To be perfectly honest as the humble and timid monkey I am. I feel proud and much like Hiro’s baymax system. I did something great for someone special. Something not many would have committed to, dared to begin nor dreamed see to the end. If it is within my me I will do what it takes, mostly because my mum taught me to stay strong, pursuit dreams and never ever give up.

The damsel-in-distress scenario challenge evokes many emotions and my knights armor was never shining but worn and battered. I saved my damsel for all the right reasons, but in the end it did not matter how I sacrificed myself. As an entrepreneur I was careless and slowly blew away the advantage I had worked so hard to obtain. Thinking she was my arrow, I know now she was not. She taught me to focus through the clishmaclave of my mind but to what extend and at what cost. It is many weeks ago since I last time wrote a blog. Today, as I write this, my left eyebrow is split and my knuckles bleed and hurt. I will get over this. Psychologists write to fix a broken heart you have to let yourself love even more. That is impossible due to my emotional life is mature and I know myself very well. I had the most beautiful and innocent woman. When timing was perfect she choose to post traumatic grow without me. Though not leaving out any scenario I should be true to myself and live by my words even though they came from craziness. Where do you see yourself in five years, then what about 10 or 20. There is no doubt in my mind. I must give my best and most radical invention back to mankind through the open source society. I was designed to create something beautiful and have a list of 50 quite (in)sane ideas I usually pitch to anyone willing to listen but the idea topping the list, I do not. It will take me years to create but no matter my financial status this one will fly both to protect me but mainly to disrupt the existing status quo. The few people who could actually fix this flawed environment are so self righteous they accept being sloth not utilizing talent. Evil is as evil does but the worst of all evil is seeing the right path, choosing to be content with things and do nothing.

This paper town of a planet needs to be awoken. Though my faith challenges me I still hope someone will create some of my ideas even before I do. It is usually as such that if one come up with something, somebody, somewhere else has the exact same idea. Kind of like universal synchronicity. It is always all about the execution and it would make me truly happy to see a sign that our planet is healing if just half of all original ideas of creations plays out. Some of these ideas really don’t cost much and with a little effort could move billions of credits around the system. I have to find home grounds so I will survive until our world levels. Also it was never my responsibility to carry the weight of the world. I vested that burden on myself. Good job f*ng yourself over Mr. Toudal but please continue as you were, life never told you stop (-:

A fruit I dislike

Magic berry

To my knowledge no fruit exists that I dislike. Those who know me, know that I eat and enjoy eating almost all things. Every day I make shakes with lots of seeds, fruits, vegetables and berries. Maybe if I consumed an African magic berry I would dislike both strawberries and melon but then again, maybe they just have to be treated accordingly. That is why this blog should be about the rotten kind.

Rotten fruit

There are many types of rotten fruits. Our planet is not a kind place and it has never know peace. On average the human monkey scheme, slander, trap and plan cruel actions. When I was employed by IBM I was taught not to unhook nor penetrate where we should not. It is not in the spirit of blue IBM. Also unhooking behavior is considered juxtapose to devious, and both savage and brutal evil that in turn, like karma, eventually would be measurable on our bottom line. I am totally aligned with this mindset. Several times in my business life my company have experience unhooking. One of these companies is currently under scrutiny for corruption and the management is being legally crushed. Grateful that those who can actually do anything about such things doesn’t turn their blind eye.

To accentuate without name dropping a specific rotten fruit. “Somebody” stole the source code of one of my private hobby projects by accident. It was an algorithm that might eventually have solve the impossible puzzle contest for a million dollar. Though the algorithm was far from complete the idea how to address to problem was so smart I tell ya. The rotten fruits had no clue to what they had acquired…

Today I know, via logic deduction, who it was back in the days that made a data burglary at our office. It was as early as 2006 but Opiin was already a clouded SaaS architecture as such there was no disruption to our production systems and our customers did not experience any downtime. We lost a bunch of documents and had to rewrite things like internal documentation, bookkeeping, contracts and our pipeline was exposed. The only real setback was we did not recover a distribution agreement we had been negotiating with a Norwegian company. It’s not being Sherlock Holmes or anything. The question is really just to identify the motive and then continue deduction observing years of business Denmark. It is much like when your mind return to a memory and eventually come up with a plausible answer to that situation. I ended up having a name for a sit down if I was ever asked to name someone for a dinner arrangement or alike. Of course the dialog would be totally off the books.

Consequence

Life events like this can be game changing and the impact was considerable for my private life. Our office and business location was the basement of my private home. To my family the feeling of security and privacy in our own home was disrupted. We did not claim any insurance, only peanuts for replacing my laptop and a couple of hard disks cut out of the servers running our test environments. As a business we really lost a lot of intellectual capital. We should have fetched a pile of gold but due to miserable journalism and the mistrust of what and why this actually happened we did not.

It was a lesson learned and we managed to stay alive, yay. We also established a hole new set of physical security and established processes for various critical areas. How fortunate our business architecture, already then, was so mature and much ahead of everybody else.

30 Day Writing Challenge

30 day challenges are very popular these days and since I have decided to blog as if my website had readers, I must seek my uncomfortable zone, and share what I do both on a personal level and as a business person. Basically considering myself a professional brand. Challenging myself does not mean I will commit to new posts every day. It is sole for me to practice writing exactly what i think, feel and believe in a simple and easy to understand format, instead being misunderstood, discarded or simply deemed in a black box.

My business card says inventor and I describe my team as one of the best integrated teams in the world to solve the current project and program engagements at hand, especially considering what we already have accomplished. Sometimes things you do as a hobby end up being what you have to do 24/7 and eradicated anything sweet, this is when a hole variety of troubles start nudging change. It is not that I have not been writing. My writing in 2017 is simply too much as well as concocted at the utmost stretched line of thought based on expectations we have yet to have seen the last Elon Musk substantiate paradigms.

This challenge is not my idea. A friend gave me a push. As you can see many of the topics are quite interesting and I am looking forward writing the next blog and steam on things dislikeable about social media. I really, really dislike the media because they make me uncomfortable and gets me overthinking but god knows I need a tailwind if I’m ever to achieve viral influence to be able to successfully nudge or spread an important message. Be a hero and an awesome human being. Be kind or strong and show gratitude by sharing. Any boost is noticed and we are genuinely appreciated.

Macro Photography Take A Deep Breath And Think About IT

Macro Photography is the art of taking close-up pictures that reveal details which can’t be seen with the naked eye. Sometimes we fail to notice the little things in life.. details which makes this world so remarkable. So here is a glimpse into the world of the very small, which normally goes largely unnoticed as we quickly shuffle through our day. So take a deep breath and be amazed by the little wonders that hides just beneath the surface.

Slow Life from Daniel Stoupin on Vimeo. A Macro Timelapse of Coral, Sponges and other Aquatic Organisms created from 150.000 Photographs.

I may have stepped on somebody toes with this post. Culture is not public domain. I was not thinking straight and deeply in love with the girl I made it for. Now that you are here, you should check out the awesome video above or maybe visit a promoted blog.